the happy conservative

I just bought a book by Mark Steyn. I’m not finished with it yet, but the basic premise is that multiculturalism and falling birth rates will lead to an Islamic society across what used to be the Western world. And this is a bad thing.

While I’m not going to talk about how much I agree with him yet, I’m going to touch on my own experience with the lazy liberal libido.

I once mentioned, not entirely in jest, about my intention to have a large family (in today’s terms, maybe on the order of four or five - to quell the feminist outcry, it’s my wife who wants five). To this a fellow WashU student and intellectual heavyweight replied, “That’s so irresponsible!”

Sigh. Now I’m a good-looking kid with a top twelve education and a guaranteed job with the Army for at least eight more years. More importantly, Mrs. Hurst is an bright young gal with lots of spunk who also happens to be drop-dead gorgeous. Between us we have half a million dollars of human capital. Aren’t we exactly the people who should reproduce?

But liberals aren’t into micro solutions. They like grand gestures of questionable intent and almost certain failure. No, of course I don’t want to have children. I’m going to take my degree in ____________________ Studies and get a job collating for MoveON.org. I can’t be bothered to have children, I’m going to be too busy heading out to the Sundance Film Festival and drinking five dollar organic chai out of a recycled paper cup. I can’t be bothered to have children; I’m going to be too busy creating a fuzzy feeling by creating diversity while hating white English-speaking men who make more than minimum wage.

Well, the happy conservative has other plans. He’s going to take his five kids out to dinner at Steak and Shake on Fridays after baseball/wrestling/football/dance/piano lessons. They’re going to learn about order and discipline and love for the land, rather than worship of it. And then they’re going to vote. And they’re going to enjoy cousins and aunts and uncles and grandparents and a mom and a dad. Just tossing money right down the drain. How do I dare?

The Roman Republic required land owning status to join the military. Landowners could be expected to fight because they had a stake in the country. Failing to reproduce when you have the means (i.e. under thirty with a job and a spouse) isn’t responsibility, it’s selfishness. Bearing children is the ultimate investment in your country, state, town, and family. Refusing to bear children so you can run off and save the world (or make outrageous sums of money) is an investment in yourself. And when you die, all that hard word will be for naught.

That’s so responsible.